Homesick

from Homesick by Ani Ces

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lyrics

I see you through your eyelids, in all of your brilliance
+ I hope you can walk right through me
because you say you see straight through me, don't you?

I went away last year, missed my flight so I walked on back,
fell more asleep with every step + I think I may have gone off track.
There was something in the air there that just felt like home
+ since I've come back I just don't take deep breaths anymore except with you.

I tell perfect stories but I can't tell what is real.
I can't accept the things you say, my head's held under the heel of my own boot.

Ask me, "is it worth it when you lie because in the moment you feel alive?
Do you spin tragedy for its own sake? Is this really how you stay awake?
Do you wake up feeling homesick? Is your headspace full of shit?
Why do you fall so easily? Does it still hurt when you fall asleep? Tell the truth."

And you're earth just like me + you're hurt just like me. I'm told it's more than shared suffering. But until I learn, won't you wait with me?

credits

from Homesick, released December 21, 2019

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Ani Ces San Antonio, Texas

Queer, Chicanx south central Texas singer-songwriter Vic Garces combines a passion for poetry, melancholy, and rock music alone, in a closet, with an acoustic guitar that doesn't entirely belong to them. You might know them from Other Plans.Or from the paintings. ... more

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